Vegan, begin again.

Two days ago I woke up & decided to be vegan. Does that sound rash, or absurd? It probably does, but it really isn’t, not to me.

I don’t doubt that the seed was planted after reading about Cath giving up sugar. I thought “Could I do that?” & decided that I probably couldn’t – or more accurately, I didn’t particularly want to. I probably do consume too much hidden sugar – I would suggest most of us do, but I don’t find it to be an issue for me. What I do find to be an issue is eating things that I wouldn’t eat if I had to go & get it myself. Like a cow. There is no way, no how, I would be able to go out in a field, kill a cow, do whatever needs to be done to it & butcher it. No way. I wouldn’t even be able to deal with watching it being done. Yet, for a while, I would happily dig in to a steak while blissfully “not thinking about it”.

That’s my simple reason for going vegan. It’s not a hugely ethical or moral decision like some people – I’m not doing it to save the world (although that’s a bonus); selfishly, I’m doing it to feel better about my own choices. I’ve always wished I was one of those vegans that can’t stand the sight, smell or taste of meat – wouldn’t that make things easier…! But alas, I am partial to a BBQ or a baked dinner (so don’t expect me to be one of those vegans that preaches at you, I’m just too lazy to be self righteous… & did I mention my Love is a butcher…?! His cutting up carcasses pays for my tofu. True.), so for me, it takes a little bit of extra willpower sometimes.

I think I’ve said before that I was vegan for 3 years before I was pregnant with The Punk, & veggo before that. With pregnancy came massive cravings for dairy – so bad that I gorged on cheese & milk before I even knew I was pregnant & felt incredibly guilty about it. When I did find out it was actually a relief & I gave myself permission to eat whatever I really wanted, thinking rightly or wrongly that if my body wanted it so much I must need it. I felt okay with that decision, telling myself that I’d “get back on the wagon” after she was born… but no.

Finally though I’m feeling it. I remember how I felt when I was vegan – it’s all starting to come back to me. Honestly I never felt better, mentally or physically. I wasn’t thin – there is some law against me being thing – but I felt GOOD. I was very rarely sick & would bounce around work while some other people were battling their third or fourth cold of the season. I had fun baking vegan things & forcing them upon people, waiting until they nodded approvingly with their mouths full before declaring “IT’S VEGAN!”, & finding new & weird vegan substitutes in Asian grocery stores.

Shopping yesterday brought it home that “We’re not in Sydney anymore, Toto”. I couldn’t find any of the things I used to use to veganise things, like faux sour cream or the mayo that still tastes like mayo & not just blended tofu. Seitan? Isn’t that like… the devil?

So, I’ll either have to travel further afield to find some ready-made staples or find some kick ass recipes to make them (it’s not like I don’t have enough cook books…), but I will, because the switch is flipped again. I’m vegan.

(all DELICIOUS LOOKING images except the last from hoveringdog on flickr)