…so, this is how I spend my time on rainy Sunday afternoons when I am actively ignoring the dishes & Le Punk is enthralled with ‘Mister Maker’ (…seriously, she loves that show!).
I find online generators for every occasion. Like a boy scout – I am always prepared, for example;
If I ever find myself in a band, hitting that triangle with wild abandon & rocking the hell out, the band’s name will be *coughs* Orgasm Monarch, courtesy of bandnamemaker.
If I ever have to enter witness protection, & if we’re serious, it could happen at any time, I can get a whole new identity from here. (For security purposes, I cannot tell you that my new name would be Imogen McDowell, I would reside in Hillside, VIC, and my new, glorious occupation would be Pesticide Sprayer. Oops.)
Or, (…this is obviously the most useful, and my favourite of all) if I ever find myself in a conversation with the ghosts of past surrealists like Picasso or Max Ernst, I can compliment them with the help of The Surrealist Compliment Generator. Of course you’ll be wanting an example;
“May bathtubs overflow upon your offspring.”
or
“You do dine so emergently that sanguine trepidation overcomes the house-staff.”
or, because it’s kind of addictive & rather amusing…
“Your nasal linings will last as long as the skin of rocks, thrust enigmatically upon a distant shoreline of mating beetles.”
Ernst: “Why thank you!”


